Worst of Wrestling #5: Bragging Rights 2010
Welcome back to the Worst of Wrestling. Last time we covered Combat Zone Wrestling’s Cage of Death XXI, a personally insulting indie show that spat on the legacy of deathmatch wrestling. Today, we return to familiar ground in the land of WWE for “the only time in the calendar year that Smackdown and Raw superstars go head to head”, Bragging Rights. Remember hearing that all of the time?
Bragging Rights is in conversation for the worst wrestling PPV of 2010. Comments on this show range from calling it flat to a complete waste of time. For me, this show was really bad for one reason more than the rest. The commentary. The voices we will be listening to are heel Michael Cole, PG Jerry Lawler and the worst of all time, Matt Striker. This was a painful listen, I want to really put over how bad commentary so I am going to mention every bad piece of commentary in this match that I pick up on. The intolerable commentary make this bad show into an unwatchable one.
We will jump into an analysis shortly, but let us take a moment to get our bearings as we travel back to the unholy wrestling year of 2010.
Background
The 2010 edition of Bragging Rights was the second and final version of this PPV. It aired live from Minneapolis, Minnesota in front of 9,000 people and garnering only 137,000 PPV buys. The theme of the show is of course “Bragging Rights” where Raw and Smackdown compete for brand supremacy. A strict brand split started in 2002 but since 2006 WWE started getting more loose on having inter-promotional matches within the brands.
In 2009, Bragging Rights replaced Cyber Sunday and saw a series of 3 inter-promotional matches for the “prestigious” Bragging Rights trophy. Smackdown won 2-1 in 2009, would they be able to do a repeat in 2010?
A reminder that the Bragging Rights event is themed, promoted and mostly built around the idea of Raw and Smackdown going head to head. Remember this point for later.
Of course, it is not just about Raw vs Smackdown, there are personal feuds to be settled too. Let’s have a look at the ongoing storylines for this show.
Storylines
Brand Supremacy
So this time around there is no series of matches for the Bragging Rights trophy. There is an inter-promotional match booked between the US champion Daniel Bryan (Raw) and the IC champion Dolph Ziggler (Smackdown) but it has no bearing on the trophy. It will only be the 14-man tag match that determines the winners of Bragging Rights. 7 of Raw’s finest vs Smackdown’s 7 finest. Their words, not mine. I am so excited to talk about who these “fine” superstars are.
Hustle, Loyalty, Nexus
The main rivalry on Raw is over the WWE championship, but also involving John Cena and the Nexus. The Nexus have been around for a few months at this point, gradually losing momentum and fan interest since their loss at Summerslam. At Hell in a Cell, Wade Barrett defeated John Cena thanks to a pair of debuting rookies, forcing Cena to join the Nexus. John Cena tries to destroy the Nexus from within, but he is forced to follow Barrett’s orders by the Anonymous Raw General Manager or he will be fired. Oh boy we are in such a TERRIBLE era of Raw right now.
Wade Barrett’s quest remains to become WWE champion. He wins a Battle Royal thanks to John Cena eliminating himself last to earn a shot against the champion, Randy Orton, a guy Cena has plenty of history with. Barrett forces John Cena to be in his corner and tells him that if Barrett loses the match, Cena will be fired from the WWE.
They have completely botched the Nexus hard by this point, WWE are trying anything to save the angle but nothing seems to be working.
Brotherly Hate
The main Smackdown feud is over the World Heavyweight Championship between Kane and The Undertaker. I’m sorry, are we sure this is 2010 and not 1997? What is going on? Well, basically The Undertaker was mysteriously put in a vegetative state and Kane went looking for the culprit. Of all people, Kane accused Rey Mysterio, notorious tiny man, of being the man who did the crime. When Undertaker returned, Kane attacked him, turning heel and confirming it was him all along. What a bastard.
Kane defeated The Undertaker in a mediocre No Holds Barred match at Night of Champions. Paul Bearer returned to reunite with Undertaker ahead of a rematch inside Hell in a Cell, but it was a ruse. Bearer betrayed Undertaker by using an urn as a torch to blind Undertaker, Kane bonked him on the head with it and defeated his brother again. That match was particularly bad.
After 2 failed attempts to destroy his brother, Kane has one more opportunity to get the job done in a Buried Alive match. Will third time be a charm for these legends to have a good match in this feud? Don’t hold your breath dear reader.
Co-Champions
The final match to talk about is for the goddamn silver butterfly belt. Layla and Michelle McCool are self-professed Co-champions, though officially it is Michelle McCool who is the champion. I don’t have much to go on here other than they are feuding with Natayla. Layla announced that she will be defending the title for her team at Bragging Rights against her.
That is all I have got for you about storylines. There are a couple of other matches to talk about but they were impromptu matches. Having impromptu matches on a PPV? That makes the show feel like an episode of Raw. We will see if that feeling holds up by the end of the show. Let’s get on with Bragging Rights 2010!
Bragging Rights 2010, Pay-Per-View Airing Live From The Target Centre in Minneapolis, minnesota
“Evil, lurks in the darkness, coming for you. Hopeless, you’re out of time. You’re about to be…buried alive.”
The cold open video package is a short and spooky video package hyping Kane vs Undertaker in a buried alive match for the Heavyweight championship. It doesn’t even really cover their feud much. Mostly a lot of close-ups of headstones, graves and barren trees.
We see the opening graphic for Bragging Rights 2010, which plays a literal 10 second clip of Raw and Smackdown wrestlers fighting each other before we get the show logo and the opening pyro display.
I thought it was a wild idea to have such a short introduction video package that barely hyped the main premise of the show. The video focused all of it’s attention on the Buried Alive match and next to no attention to what is the overall theme for the entire event. Guess what? Neither of those things are the main event! They haven’t even built hype for the main event match with this opening. I find that to be very foolish. It is almost like they are desperately relying on the gimmick of a Buried Alive match to gain interest because their weak ass booking isn’t pulling in the buys.
Late 00s and early 2010s pyro display’s are nuts, I love how excessive they are.
The photo below is way later in the show but it is to show you the theming of the event. I actually really like the Smackdown & Raw stage, separated by a suspended WWE logo. It looks cool, straight out of a video game. God I miss the old scratch logo so much, it looks cool and far less corporate.
What I really do not like about about the theming is the half blue, half red ring ropes. I think they look incredibly ugly. Plus, as you can see, they haven’t even set them up so it aligns with the blue & red of the stage! It is one of the worst looking ring setups I have ever seen.
The theme song playing is called “It’s Your Last Shot” by Politics & Assassins. It is fine, but it sounds like nearly every band you have heard before mixed together. They sound like a shittier Shinedown.
Welcome
We get a crowd shot and it is a sea of signs which is awesome. I miss this part of wrestling. One reads TNA, another says “Sheamus stole my sunscreen” and a cringe one reads “without me you’d just be aweso.” Is that a Miz sign, or just an awful self-glaze?
“Tonight it’s about earning a year long long opportunity to boast, to blow one’s horn, to gloat in grandstands. Tonight is about Bragging Rights.”
No. Tonight is about Buried Alive, apparently.
Michael Cole and Jerry Lawler briefly hype the Randy Orton vs Wade Barrett main event before talking about the “beautiful” Bragging Rights trophy that is on the line which we can see at ringside. Here is a photo of said trophy.
Massive chunk of silver junk. This looks like the cheapest thing I have ever seen. Is this a trophy or did this fall off the back of truck? It looks like part of the machine Randall makes in Monster’s Inc. to suck out the screams from children.
Michael Cole introduces himself, Raw’s Jerry Lawler and Smackdown’s Matt Striker. They talk about the Heavyweight championship match. Matt Striker’s first sentence is “perhaps only once in a lifetime do you get the opportunity to see someone buried alive.”
WRONG. You are 36 years old in 2010 Matt, watching the 5th ever WWE Buried Alive match since the first in 1996.
Striker says this may be the “last waltz in a graveyard symphony” which is a perfect example of obnoxious profoundness that makes me hate him so much. He claims that either Kane or Undertaker will be covered in earth, dirt and maggots.
They don’t shovel maggots onto corpses Matt, but I don’t expect you to know that, you’re only a FORMER TEACHER.
“The world heavyweight championship will make for quite the tombstone at the end of this twisted tale.”
Ohhhh brother, THIS GUY STINKS!
Daniel Bryan vs Dolph Ziggler
“EXCUSE ME!!!!” Smackdown Consultant Vickie Guerrero comes out and does her annoying shtick to loud boos from the crowd. She introduces the “innerconinnenal” champion, Dolph Ziggler. Ziggler is in his tight Billy Gunn trunks, slicked back bleach blonde hair era. Cole says that Vickie’s figure is voluptuous. He refers to issues developing between Vickie & Dolph thanks to Vickie’s rookie on season 3 of NXT, Kaitlyn. Kaitlyn has the hots for Dolph and Vickie is jealous. Striker says “Kaitlyn gives me a fever the size of the Sahara, she’s absolutely radiant, but Dolph has to focus on his opponent tonight.”
Michael Cole claims that Vickie made a “cougar sign” to him, but Striker claims she was making it to him. Lawler says they can both have her, Striker replies “nice”.
If there was a God, he would have cast a treacherous storm to blow out the broadcast at this moment and save our souls.
Daniel Bryan comes out now to a lot of cheers. Michael Cole of course audibly rolls his eyes. This match was literally set up 6 days ago on Raw. Bryan challenges Ziggler. Ziggler accepts. Ziggler tries a cheap shot. Bryan counters and taps him out with the Lebell Lock.
Matt Striker claims that this will be interesting, because Dolph uses the sleeper hold with “maximum efficacy” whilst Bryan has the LeBell lock.
I know Ziggler uses the sleeper as a signature move, but I literally cannot tell you a single match that he has ever won with the sleeper hold. That is not maximum efficacy.
Jerry Lawler says he heard Dolph puts himself in a sleeper hold when he goes out with Vickie. Cole says that every Daniel Bryan match is like a sleeper hold.
Great. More asshole Michael Cole burying Daniel Bryan on commentary. I cannot wait to hear for the 100th time why he irrationally hates him.
The match
The bell rings as US champ meets IC champ. Early feeling out process from these 2 as the fans chant loudly for Bryan. Michael Cole admits that Bryan is over with the fans and a submission specialist, he just doesn’t like him because he is a nerd.
Sounds like projection to me.
Bryan tries to get a heel hook in but Ziggler reaches the ropes. Bryan goes for the LeBell lock but Ziggler escapes out the ring. He runs after him but he moves Vickie in-between them. Bryan hops on the apron, runs and jumps over Vickie to hit a flying knee strike. Matt Striker threw out one of his signature “woah!”.
Hey reader, take a drink every time Matt says “woah!”
Back in the ring, Bryan hits a dropkick but Ziggler rolls out again. Bryan goes after him but Dolph yanks him throat-first into the ropes. Dolph Ziggler is now in firm control and begins a very long heat segment on Bryan. Dolph Ziggler gets a series of 2 counts from an inverted powerslam, a snapmare and an elbow drop. Ziggler targets Bryan’s neck with offence and attempting to lock in the sleeper hold.
Daniel Bryan finally manages a counter and starts his comeback Backflip over Dolph from the corner, rebounding off the ropes with a clothesline. A running kick gets a 2. Bryan lands an awesome springboard missile dropkick, leaping halfway across the ring to strike Ziggler for a near fall. Ziggler ducks a kick and rolls Bryan up for a near fall. He lands a sweet superkick for a great near fall, sold well by both men. Dolph goes for the Zig Zag, Bryan holds the top rope and lands a massive head kick for a near fall. The camera completely misses this by focusing on Vickie instead.
Daniel Bryan goes for a top rope back suplex but Ziggler shifts his weight for a crossbody which gets a near fall, Bryan transitioning into a pin of his own for anther near fall. Great sequence. Bryan counters the sleeper, both men go for a crossbody and wipe each other out. You could hear the impact. The crowd are super hot for this now.
Both men trade strikes and pin attempts, Vickie is screaming like crazy on the outside. Ziggler hits the famouser but Bryan’s foot lands on the rope. He goes for the sleeper hold, Bryan manages to reach the ropes. Ziggler and Vickie argue with the referee. Dolph loses his cool and shouts at Bryan that he doesn’t deserve to be in the ring with him. Bryan traps him in the LeBell lock and makes him tap out.
Dolph Ziggler lost his cool and Bryan capitalised. Vickie & Dolph argue with the referee, Vickie screams her head off so the referee ejects them.
But the match is already over, what are you ejecting them from?
The Commentary
This is an era of commentary where they have to always be talking, never letting anything breathe. They’re not good enough to naturally fill the air so a lot of it is repetitive wrestling brain rot. Jerry cracks jokes, Matt over-analyses, Cole attempts to call wrestling moves while being a knob. Great.
Matt Striker asks Michael Cole what his beef is with Daniel Bryan. He should literally be the last person to ask him that question. HE WAS THERE WHEN IT STARTED. Season 1 of NXT, you were there Matt, you waste of resources.
Jerry Lawler says he heard Vickie got hit by a car because the driver didn’t have enough gas to go around her. Ha.
Michael Cole calls a neckbreaker a backbreaker. Matt Striker calls an inverted powerslam an inverted bodyslam.
Matt Striker says Vickie’s arms jiggle when she claps. “See look, Jiggles and Ziggles”. Choose a lane Matt, are you the bad guy who wants to fuck Vickie Guerrero, are you a serious analyst, or are you here to make fat jokes?
Matt Striker says “Aside from the LeBell lock, Daniel Bryan is a master of the Small Package, has a lot of unique impact moves as well.” He later talks about how Bryan has a cornucopia of submission holds. Master of the small package? You don’t have a clue what you’re talking about do you?
Michael Cole incorrectly claims Daniel Bryan was a standout in NXT season 1 before eliminating himself. We all know that Bryan was made to look like a joke all season before being eliminated by WWE management for lack of faith in himself.
Cole doesn’t understand Jerry’s dislike for Vickie, she is gorgeous. Matt responds that she is too old for King which is brutally accurate. The annoying Michael Cole cackle. Jerry mocks Vickie’s high-pitched voice.
“Ziggler is getting his head kicked off, literally” says Cole and Matt Striker corrects him, which is fair. Dolph’s head is very much still attached to his shoulders.
“I think Guerrero is about to bring out her flying Monkey’s” says Lawler. Matt laughs and responds “Vickie is like Kent Hrbek in a dress”. Huh? It gets no reaction. Kent Hrbek is an incredibly dated reference to a Minnesota baseball player from the 1980s. Matt Striker making niche references to try and look cool.
“What a match guys” Cole says, even though he claimed earlier that Bryan matches put him to sleep.
Analysis
My rating; ***3/4
What a great match, diminished by its incredibly slow start. The early heat segment by Dolph goes on for a long time and not a lot of excitement is generated. It helps that Daniel Bryan is so over and being supported by the crowd, but it was starting to make me lose interest.
However, once Bryan made his comeback the match found a great pace and flourished. I really liked how both champions were equals in the ring, the decision only coming down to the story that commentary were pushing of Ziggler being a hothead who cannot contain his emotions.
This was a fantastic way to open the show. Both men sold their arses off for each other and made sure their offence looked tight. This match set a pace that the rest of the show was unfortunately unable to keep up with.
Team Raw Segment
The Miz and Alex Riley were watching the match backstage from the Team Raw locker room. The Miz is Mr Money in the Bank. Miz takes credit for Daniel Bryan’s victory and claims Raw is off to a great start thanks to his leadership. Alex Riley glazes Miz some more but Sheamus pushes him out the way and laughs at the thought. He says he won’t be taking orders from The Miz.
In walks CM Punk to loud cheers from the crowd. He says Miz is barely Cap’n Crunch, let alone team captain. Punk calls himself Captain Straight Edge. He mocks The Miz for being taken out by Rey Mysterio, Miz mocks him back for being taken out by Edge. Punk, Miz and Sheamus all argue. You can’t really make most of it out, but you can hear Punk point to Alex Riley and say “I don’t even know who the hell you are.”
Santino Marella walks in gets the loudest cheer of them all. He asks where the snacks & beverages he was promised were. The Miz refuses to talk about snacks & beverages, they need to strategize. CM Punk has just came from Smackdown so he knows them like the back of his hand. Punk says “If anybody is going to be taking orders and giving orders, it’s gonna be me and you’re gonna be following them.” Santino Marella would like to order some SunChips. Everyone stares at him, so he leaves.
Sheamus doesn’t give a “fiddler’s” about Miz’s strategy, he is going to kick people’s heads off. CM Punk laughs and tells Miz that Sheamus is going to kick his head off. Miz speaks to Punk and passionately tries to rally the troops because they are Team Raw and they are awesome. CM Punk laughs, looks at Alex Riley and says “some of us are awesome”. Alex Riley tells Miz to get the team together. He calls someone a “Keebler Elf” though I’m not sure who. I assume Sheamus but it doesn’t make sense because a Keebler Elf is not a leprechaun, or Irish. The Miz smiles and says that the team is where it needs to be.
Analysis
This was a full 3 minute backstage segment of Team Raw talking. I guess the idea here was to build more hype for the Bragging Rights match but this felt like filler. The Miz does really try here and make this stipulation feel like a big deal. Santino Marella comes in and provides a couple of funny lines. I always liked Santino even if some of his humour was a bit too much for me.
We have the worst version of Sheamus, very Irish and very babyface saying stuff like “fiddlers” in place for “fuck” which is pretty cringe. CM Punk looks completely checked out and over all of this bullshit and I cannot blame him. This segment was rough.
Michael Cole compares The Miz to General Patton, mere seconds before introducing National Guard Soldiers who are in the front row for this show. He says that those guys really deserve Bragging Rights.
And this is why heel Michael Cole doesn’t work, because he cannot commit to it. I am not expecting him to slander the US National Guard, but it is a contradiction to have him compare The Miz to a prominent army officer just before this. It is not a good look for the lead announcer who is essentially the voice of the entire company. Maybe I am nit-picking here, I could imagine Jesse Ventura being able to pull off a commentary call like this, but Michael Cole certainly cannot.
Let’s Hear From The Tag Champs
“Woaahh, you’re only smoke and mirrors!” Cody Rhodes and Drew McIntyre are the Unified Tag Team Champions and they come to the ring.
I love the ‘Dashing’ Cody Rhodes character, he did a great job. It is crazy to look at Cody & Drew then compared to now. They are so much smaller than now and they lack all of the physical aura that they would get after leaving WWE. I LOVE Drew’s song Broken Dreams. It wouldn’t suit him now, but it was such a banger back in the day. They are both dressed in their ring gear.
Matt Striker says his younger sister is watching this at home because she has a crush on them. Jerry Lawler says that when he was younger and saw someone like Rhodes, he’d pin a tail on it.
“Bragging Rights. What an appropriate name for the evening because who has more to brag about than the tag champions Drew McIntyre and myself, Dashing Cody Rhodes”. Drew talks about how they have dominated everyone from Raw and Smackdown, but they were mostly all from Raw. No one wants to face them because they are scared to death of them. Whilst Drew is talking, Lawler and Cole are talking and laughing over this, mocking his Scottish accent.
Shut the fuck up! (5x claps).
The lights flicker as we get a notification. Oh no. Michael Cole says “Can I have you attention please. I have just received an email from the anonymous Raw General Manager. And I quote…” I HATE THIS SO MUCH. Apparently there is a team on Raw worthy of facing them for tag titles tonight. We hear The Nexus music play and Wade Barrett comes out.
Matt Striker says Wade is making his way to Bragging Rights, which is such a weird thing to say about a man walking down the entrance way. He is already at Bragging Rights. You don’t enter an Asda or a Target and say “I am making my way to the shop” YOU ARE IN THE SHOP ALREADY.
Wade Barrett says that tonight is going to be the greatest night in the history of the Nexus when he is crowned WWE champion. He introduces the next tag team champions. David Otunga and…John Cena.
John Cena runs down to the ring, ignoring the Nexus and hyping up the crowd. Commentary remind us John Cena will be fired if he doesn’t do Barrett’s bidding. “I think we are going to have a tag team championship match.” You think, Lawler?
Analysis
Drew McIntyre’s promo deliver was far from what he would be capable of in the future. Cody Rhodes still has a lot of charisma here, but again, he would improve a lot more. I didn’t appreciate commentary talking over and mocking Drew, that only has negative effects on the guy.
Not sure why they had to do it this way and couldn’t have just booked this match beforehand. I knew it was too good to be true to have no John Cena match on this card. This segment only went a few minutes, but I could have done without it. This made a PPV feel like an episode of Raw, especially with the godawful anonymous Raw GM stuff.
Cody Rhodes & Drew McIntyre (c) vs The Nexus, Unified Tag Championships
Interesting match this, not in a good way. We have 3 heels and John Cena, who is technically a face but he is resented by a loud portion of the wrestling community. This is the worst version of John Cena here too. Shaved head and dog tags, cosplaying as some sort of military man. He has a poor, limited move set and his acting is atrocious. We also have David Otunga, notoriously one of the worst wrestlers WWE has ever hired and absolutely the worst member of the Nexus.
The Match
John Cena wants to start the match but Otunga shoves him back and tells him to stand on the apron. Cena has the face of a sad baby who isn’t allowed another rusk. Cena eventually concedes and allows Otunga to start.
Cody Rhodes quickly trips Otunga up and tags in Drew for some double teaming. They keep Otunga in their corner away from Cena and stomp him out. Otunga gets his ass kicked for quite some time before making it back to his corner and slapping Cena on the chest, tagging him in. The match essentially restarts with Cena and Rhodes locking up. Cody cheap shots Cena in the corner to get some punches in, but Cena counters and hits a lazy fisherman’s suplex, he doesn’t even grab the leg, he just slaps it a little. That gets a 1 count. David Otunga is shouting over for a tag but Cena ignores him. Otunga enters the ring and gets in Cena’s face, allowing Cody to attack from behind.
Now it is time for the John Cena heat segment. Cody and Drew slowly beat down John Cena. They don’t do any moves for the longest time, just a load of stomping and punching. McIntyre hits an STO for a 2 count. The fans are chanting “let’s go Cena, Cena sucks”. Cody Rhodes locks in a submission on Cena, John Cena manages to fight out and begins his trademark comeback. He hits Rhodes with 2 shoulder tackles. Drew McIntyre tags in and eats a back suplex. David Otunga is calling for the tag but Cena refuses. He hits Drew with the 5 knuckle shuffle.
A distraction by Cody allows Drew to attempt the Future Shock DDT, but Cena back drops him over the ropes. Cody tags Drew as he falls out the ring and goes for the Cross Rhodes, but Cena counters and locks in the STF to win.
John Cena wins lol.
David Otunga is celebrating, but he turns around into an AA from John Cena. Cena walks out with both Unified Tag Titles.
The Commentary
Because this is a John Cena match, Michael Cole is now back to being a babyface commentator. Cole can bury Daniel Bryan and any other good guy wrestler in the midcard, but we cannot have Cole criticising our golden goose now can we.
Matt Striker says John Cena received a rousing ovation from the Minnesota crowd. “It’s like he’s Joe Mauer, Adrian Peterson & Dino Ciccarelli rolled into one.” WE GET IT MATT, YOU KNOW SPORTS.
Matt Striker calls John Cena a reluctant soldier, whilst Cena is trying to be the one to start the match. That is the opposite of reluctant.
Matt Striker seriously compares Cody Rhodes & Drew McIntyre to the Road Warriors.
Commentary reference John Cena being forced into the Nexus or being forced to take orders over and over and over and over and over and over and over again.
Jerry Lawler calling Cena & Otunga “new tag team champions” seconds before Cody Rhodes even tapped out.
Matt Striker claims that the competitiveness of John Cena led him to winning, but now he realised what he has just done by winning tag gold for The Nexus. This is stupid because the story they spent all match pushing is how John Cena HAS to compete or he will get fired for not following orders. He knows what he is doing, he just doesn’t like it.
Analysis
My rating; *
This was a really bad match. John Cena hit 7 moves. David Otunga hit no moves. Cody Rhodes only does punches and kicks. Drew McIntyre does punches, kicks and a single STO. Where is the wrestling? There is none!
Now I don’t mind if there is a match that isn’t about the wrestling. Maybe this is more about the story than the action. Okay. So the story here is that David Otunga is useless and needs John Cena to carry the team to victory. John Cena is a good guy, but he is forced to work for the evil Nexus or be fired. That is a small piece of an overarching story which is the poorly booking Nexus storyline because ever since Summerslam, they never truly feel like a threat to the main roster ever again. So, if this is a storyline match, the story sucks which means the match is going to suck too.
Putting a heel team vs a heel team is risky and it almost never pays off unless you can tell a good story. This was pointless filler that doesn’t even belong on TV nevermind a $50 PPV. This is another chapter in WWE caring so little about their tag division that they just feed the champions to John Cena, who essentially won a handicap match. It is hard to care about the tag division when the champions were a thrown together team already, beaten by another thrown together team.
Cody and Drew did nothing with the time they had in control, which could have been a John Cena call knowing him around this time period.
The match was boring and the booking is bad. Even worse is the fact that literally the next night on Raw, Cena & Otunga lose the titles to Heath Slater & Justin Gabriel, who are also in the Nexus. What a waste of time.
We get a trailer for a movie starring the Big Show called Knucklehead. It looks like the worst, unfunniest comedy of all time. Of course when we cut back to the commentary trio, they are all laughing their asses off at how funny the movie is. Cole segues from Knuckleheads by talking about Ted DiBiase Jr.
Michael Cole talks about Ted DiBiase Jr and Maryse receiving weird, flirtatious messages. They thought they were being stalked. It was revealed on Raw 3 weeks prior to this show that Goldust was the one behind the messages, who attacks DiBiase with the Final Cut. Goldust didn’t want DiBiase nor did he want Maryse, he wanted the Million Dollar Championship. Goldust steals the title.
Backstage Interview
Ted DiBiase and Maryse are interviewed by Josh Matthews, apparently we are moments away from his match with Goldust. A match that hasn’t been announced or referred to at all before now. Matthews asks how Ted is going to get his title back. DiBiase says that Goldust doesn’t belong in the same ring as him, he doesn’t even belong in his tax bracket. He says he is going to beat Goldust, take back his title and then “have his fake NXT girlfriend deported.” Maryse says some more French stuff, Ted follows up saying “exactly”.
Ted DiBiase is referring to Aksana, a Lithuanian who is competing in Season 3 of NXT. Pretty funny that he wants a foreigner deported when he is also dating a foreigner. This was a bad promo. Ted DiBiase has negative amounts of charisma. I would have more fun talking to a cardboard box than talking to him. He is so bland and boring. There is nothing to him other than the fact he is the son of the original Ted DiBiase. I cannot believe WWE saw more in this guy than Cody Rhodes initially.
Michael Cole says that Ted DiBiase has a point. Does he? He transitions back to being a heel now by saying Goldust has no right to steal the championship.
Is Cole for or against DiBiase? He called him a knucklehead earlier, but now he is supporting his gripe with Goldust. Cole then buries the whole thing anyways by saying the Million Dollar Championship isn’t a real title.
Ted DiBIase vs Goldust
Ted DiBiase looks like he has been hitting sunbeds far too hard. He looks swollen with tan. Matt Striker says that Goldust is a bizarre man who paints himself like on Oscar Award. Cole questions why DiBiase is worried about the title when he has Maryse on his arm.
That…is a fair point.
Jerry Lawler says DiBiase is so rich, he even expects Maryse to cook, which I don’t understand what the joke is meant to be but I assume it is sexist. Matt Striker says “she is cooking for me, I’ll tell you that much.” Cole let’s out a fake “Hah Hah Hah!”
Goldust comes out with the wig and the a gold robe, alongside Aksana. Matt Striker starts speed talking about Goldust, Aksana and NXT until Jerry tells him to slow the fuck down. Essentially, Aksana’s paper’s are not in order and risks being sent back to Lithuania, so Goldust suggested that they get married so she can get a green card to stay here.
Michael Cole says “look at this” and starts talking about a bunch of jewellery that Maryse handed him. The camera never cuts over to show what he is talking about. Michael Cole says he might go pawn the jewellery.
The Match
Ted DiBiase takes the early advantage beating up Goldust in the corner, but the bizarre one hits a jumping hip attack and clotheslines him out of the ring. They fight outside for a bit but once they are back in the ring, DiBiase gets the heat on Goldust.
Loud chants for Goldust as he slowly gets his ass kicked. Goldust finally hits a back suplex for some space. He fires off some punches and clotheslines, followed by the atomic drop and a bulldog for a 2. Goldust misses a crossbody attempt and tumbles to the outside.
Goldust fights his way back into the ring. He goes for a diving double axe but DiBiase meets him with a dropkick for a 2 count. DiBiase goes for the Million Dollar Dream, Goldust counters, but Ted hits a sit-out spinebuster for a 2.
Maryse attacks Aksana on the outside and rolls her into the ring. Goldust goes to check on her, allowing DiBiase to attack from behind and hit a basement DDT to pin and win.
Maryse collects the Million Dollar Championship, but Aksana attacks her. Ted DiBiase confronts her, so Aksana flirts with him and teases a kiss. DiBiase gets hooked by this immediately and goes in for it, but he is attacked from behind by Goldust with the Final Cut. Goldust & Aksana leave with the Million Dollar Championship.
The Commentary
Matt Striker and Michael Cole debating who Maryse was giving the jewellery too and who she was paying more attention to. They sound like virgins.
Goldust does a hip attack which Matt Striker calls the “Butt-Butt”.
Michael Cole says they should ship Aksana on a boat back to Lithuania. Jerry Lawler says that sometimes those mail-order brides do work out. They all start talking about Mel Gibson.
Matt Striker repeats everything Michael Cole just said about how Ted DiBiase feels embarrassed that Goldust stole his title.
Michael Cole starts wearing the jewellery and they start talking about the jewellery. Matt Striker says “the rumours are true.” I don’t have a clue what he is suggesting but I know that it is probably mean-spirited and offensive in some way.
Matt Striker talks about how Aksana is adjusting to western civilisation, as if she is from a third-world country when in fact Lithuania is a high-earning country. Lawler says “that the scary part of it” which is wrong but I am not quite sure in what way.
Michael Cole mocks Goldust & Aksana’s 2 month relationship. Matt Striker says that is longer than most of his. That doesn’t surprise me.
Michael Cole asks what Goldust and Aksana talk about on a nightly basis.
Jerry Lawler says if DiBiase and Maryse get married, she would be nothing but a trophy wife. Michael Cole says “and you’ve never had a trophy wife” which gets an “ohhhh!” out of Striker. Admittedly a good bar from Cole here.
Matt Striker is the king of saying lots of words that mean absolutely nothing. After Goldust misses a crossbody and falls to the outside, he says “well this is where Ted DiBiase thrives now. He’s gonna leave Goldust out there and let the pain register. And then once Ted realises the situation, Ted DiBiase will attack.” What an absolute nothing burger of a statement. A load of meaningless hoopla. What is funnier is that he is immediately proved wrong when DiBiase goes for the attack and gets dropped by Goldust.
Jerry Lawler asks if Lithuanian is the language Aksana speaks. Matt Striker mocks him for asking. Jerry asks if there is such a thing and Matt says “yes, technically.” How can you say technically? The answer is yes, Lithuanian is a language.
Ted DiBiase hits a sit-out spinebuster and Matt Striker says “shades of Arn Anderson”. Arn never did a sit-out when doing a spinebuster. Also Jerry Lawler just responds saying “Maryse”.
Matt Striker did a silly voice saying “this is my title. I like to be down” and “thank you very much” impersonating Aksana. The cringe is so strong.
All 3 of them level up their sleaziness after Aksana tricked DiBiase into thinking they were going to kiss. Michael Cole calls her a wench and says “you can’t do that to a man”. Then Jerry Lawler says that we shouldn’t be surprised by a woman deceiving a man. Then, Matt Striker says “I want to play checkers all over her dress”. I hate you all.
Analysis
My rating; *1/2
A fine but incredibly dull match here. This is another TV match that doesn’t belong on the show. This isn’t even a Raw match, this is a Superstars or a Main Event match, the C shows. Goldust really tries here and he gets the crowd on his side. He does some solid work but he cannot get anything good out of DiBiase.
Ted DiBiase tries to wrestle like his dad and it is not good. He spends no time trying to get heat from the crowd. He runs through his boring catalogue of boring moves. That is all Ted DiBiase is. Boring. This match even included a catfight…in 2010? That is crazy.
I don’t have any problem with commentary putting over how attractive a woman is. I think it is fine to comment on how gorgeous, or hot someone is. The issue is how it is done. When Jerry Lawler does it, it comes off as creepy. When Michael Cole or Matt Striker do it, it comes across as cringey, as if they have never been near a woman before.
A mediocre feud, leading to a bad match. Nice to see Maryse though.
Layla (c) vs Natalya, Divas Championship
Commentary build more hype for the Bragging Rights trophy being on the line later on as the music of LayCool plays. Matt Striker puts a silly voice on and says “here comes my little English muffin.”
Layla and Michelle McCool walk to the ring doing silly voices too, mocking the Minnesota people and calling them fat. As much as I love the LayCool dynamic, this is a painfully cringe. However, they save it at the end by saying they are going to beat Natalya faster than they deleted all the text messages they received from Brett Favre. “real talk, ew. Stop!”
Around this time, Brett Favre was being investigated for sexting and leaving inappropriate voice messages to an NFL panelist. Topical humour, and quite edgy for WWE at this time.
Matt Striker is going “oh!” and “ah!” before ending with “that’s Shockmaster bad. That was so bad”. Great job trying to bury these 2 on live TV to make yourself look smart. Live on PPV comparing these women to one of the most infamously awful promo botches of all time. You were just swooning over them a minute ago, so you look pretty foolish right now.
The Match
Some good chain wrestling to start, Natalya lifts Layla up for a delayed vertical suplex, doing a couple squats before dropping her down, British Bulldog style. Layla dropkicks Natalya out of the ring. Natalya drags Layla out of the ring and throws her into the barricade and back in the ring. Layla is screaming like crazy throughout all this. Michelle McCool pulls Natalya off the apron to the floor to help her co-champion.
Layla locks in a cool submission that kinda looks like the Rings of Saturn if she did it with her legs. Natalya fights out into a full guard position, she transitions and lifts Layla up into a scoop slam which was impressive. Natties fires back with a clothesline for a near fall. Natalya with a double underhook suplex and now she starts a comeback sequence. A pair of clotheslines and a dropkick gets a 2.
Natalya hits the discus lariat and sets up the Sharpshooter, but Layla reaches the ropes and escapes. Layla tries to runaway, Michelle catches up to her and tries to calm her down but Natalya catches up to them. As they are getting in the ring, McCool gives Natalya a big boot and Layla pins her to win.
The Commentary
Matt Striker calls LayCool mocking Natalya’s heritage “hilarious as well as disturbing”. Michael Cole says it was hysterical. Jerry Lawler doesn’t comment, so the heels are being put over as entertaining at the expense of the face.
Matt Striker calls a the cool submission Layla did a “unique surfboard hold” which is not correct. If you look at what a surfboard hold/stretch looks like, it is no where near close to what Layla was doing.
Matt Striker likes that when Layla’s shoulders are pinned down to the mat, she tries to kick out. Duh?!
Analysis
My rating; **
A short match, it doesn’t even reach 5 minutes but that is the state of women’s wrestling at this time in WWE. I actually thought that all of this was solid work though. Layla played her role of heel well, Natalya one of the best women’s wrestlers in the company at this time, she can reliably put on a good performance. They followed a simple match layout and I think it worked out the best they could.
Plus, commentary bullshit was kept to somewhat of a minimum. That is always nice.
Michael Cole says that Jerry Lawler was at the Mall of America earlier, but Jerry says he wasn’t because there was nearly a disaster on his way to Minneapolis. His plane caught fire.
I’m not sure if this is supposed to be a bit, but I don’t care about it either way.
Josh Matthews is stood in the grave near the entrance, a hilarious camera shot. He says it is chilling to stand in this grave where someone will be buried alive. Josh spends far too long overexplaining the rules to a Buried Alive match that we have already heard before tonight. He says “buried alive” like 4 times in 30 seconds. Now a video package plays, a similar one to what opened the show. It plays a bunch of highlights of the feud so far, it doesn’t really tell much of a story. This whole feud is being sold on the Buried Alive match concept.
Kane (c) vs The Undertaker, Buried Alive for Heavyweight Championship
The Undertaker enters first here. Bragging Rights 2010 ends up being his last non-Wrestlemania PPV for 5 years. Michael Cole mentions how The Undertaker has been in every other Buried Alive match, which really goes against the notion that this match is the finality of a man’s career. Cole questions how Kane can be stopped with Paul Bearer by his side. Has Michael Cole not seen Wrestlemania XIV?
The Match
Kane makes his entrance but The Undertaker runs up the ramp and attacks him. Undertaker punches the crap out of Kane on the outside. They get in the ring, Taker hits a splash in the corner, then a corner clothesline. Kane tries to leave through the crowd, Undertaker follows him and punches him some more in the crowd. Both men make it back to ringside, Undertaker starts throwing a couple chairs into the ring, ECW style.
Undertaker drapes Kane on the apron and hits the leg drop. Again, Kane tries to run away through the crowd and once again Undertaker follows him. More crowd punching by Taker until they return to ringside. They get into the ring and Kane uses a chair as a weapon. He drops Undertaker with a 2 chokeslams, before carrying him towards the gravesite.
Undertaker and Kane slowly trade punches on the ramp. Undertaker wins the duel and punches Kane some more. Kane retreats towards the gravesite. Undertaker tries a chokeslam but Kane throws dirt in his eyes, following up with a big boot. Taker traps him in the Hell’s gate submission, making Kane pass out. Undertaker pushes Kane into the grave, he locks eyes with Paul Bearer. Bearer begs for mercy, Undertaker teases chokeslamming him but here comes The Nexus?
Undertaker fights off the Nexus for a while but eventually the numbers get too much for him. Kane climbs out of the grave. The Nexus lift Undertaker up, Kane hits him with the urn. The Nexus start shovelling dirt on top of The Undertaker but Kane tells them to go away. He channels his evil magic to trigger a blast of fire to come up from behind the gravestone. Then, a bulldozer carrying a load of soil magically tips all of the dirt into the grave, burying Undertaker alive. Kane wins.
Kane leaves with his Heavyweight championship, but as the camera zooms in on the grave we hear a bong. Lightning strikes the grave setting the stone on fire again. Undertaker’s music plays as well as some creepy ghost noises. A projection of The Undertaker’s logo shines on the gravestone.
The Commentary
Michael Cole returns to being a face commentator again, because I guess he isn’t allowed to talk shit about The Undertaker either.
There is a solid 20 seconds where none of them are saying anything whilst Undertaker slowly beats up Kane in the crowd.
Lawler says “Undertaker is filling the ring with these chairs”. He threw 3 chairs into the ring.
The insufferable and constant over-explanation and repetition of how you win a Buried Alive match and the fact the Heavyweight title is on the line. I audibly shouted in frustration. I also hate when they keep using different adjectives and descriptors when talking about the same thing. It all sounds so commercial and forced.
Jerry Lawler says the World Heavyweight Championship is an afterthought. I’m not criticising him for this, he is actually right, but I am criticising WWE for this, because that should not be the case.
Matt Striker again just hearing what Michael Cole says and repeating it almost verbatim.
Michael Cole says “you can say what you want about Undertaker and Kane and the problems they have had, but they are blood.” Matt Striker responds “yes but the same poison flows through the blood of both of these brothers.” I don’t understand what point he is trying to make.
Matt Striker calls The Nexus “minions at a gravesite”.
Analysis
My rating; DUD
One of the worst WWE matches I have seen. This is 16 minutes long and these two do fuck all. Kane and Undertaker have never been known for having many good matches, except for Wrestlemania 14. However, I think this match is their worst.
This was brawl at a snail’s pace, they lumbered in and around the ring throwing punches and nothing else. At least Kane hit a couple of chokeslams I guess. The action was lifeless and soul-destroying, but it was the booking that drags this down to a dud rating.
First of all, the match booking. Why the fuck is Kane playing a chickenshit heel? Kane has faced him twice before and defeated him so he should be confident. Also, the Buried Alive challenge came from Paul Bearer on Kane’s behalf, it was not something that the Undertaker forced Kane to do. The first half of this match was watching a pathetic 300 monster running away from an opponent he has dominated over the last couple of months. It made no sense.
What made even less sense was The Nexus attacking The Undertaker. Commentary were confused and so was I. Did Paul Bearer hire them? Did Kane hire them? Why did they not attack Kane at all? The rumour is that a Wade Barrett vs Undertaker match for Wrestlemania was in the works, but Vince McMahon cancelled those plans. So this interference happens, and it is never referenced again. There is no explanation and there is no follow up. This is the culmination of a 4-month long chapter, closing out a 13 year story between Undertaker and Kane, and it makes no sense whatsoever.
Josh Matthews interviews WWE champion Randy Orton. Orton says Cena is torn between being a part of the Nexus and part of WWE. Orton says if Cena tries to get involved, he will drop him in the middle of the ring.
This was really awkward, I feel like Orton had more to say and he was either told not to or he messed up his lines.
Raw vs Smackdown, Elimination Tag
It is time to determine Bragging Rights! “14 of the WWE’s biggest stars are going to battle”. Remember that line as you look above at the match graphic and read below the entrances coming in.
Team Raw enters first, Michael Cole starts referring to Raw as his team, even though he does lead commentary for both brands, so fuck Smackdown I guess. Team captain The Miz enters with Alex Riley, who is NOT part of the team but he is like a mascot I guess? The rest of the team enter one by one. CM Punk, John Morrison, Ezekiel Jackson, Santino Marella, R-Truth and lastly Sheamus.
Matt Striker starts listing a bunch of Marvel references comparing Smackdown to The Avengers and Bragging Rights to Secret Wars and Avengers vs X-Men. Michael Cole says “do you mean Team Smurf?” I’m not sure why Cole is trying to disparage a brand he is also a part of.
Smackdown time now as captain Big Show enters, along with mascot Hornswoggle. Swoggle is wearing a Viking helmet with braids on them. Joining Show is Rey Mysterio, Jack Swagger, Tyler Reks, Kofi Kingston, Alberto Del Rio & Edge.
14 biggest superstars in WWE huh? Tyler Reks, Ezekiel Jackson, Santino Marella & R-Truth are the upper echelon? That is a concern.
Matt Striker calls Swagger the best grappler in WWE. He also calls Edge the most experienced in this match, when that honour obviously goes to Rey Mysterio.
The Match
John Morrison starts against Tyler Reks. They don’t really do too much interesting until Morrison lands a dropkick. Morrison tags in Santino Marella who goes for the Cobra but Tyler Reks counters. Tyler hits his Burning Hammer finisher and pins Santino.
Santino Marella is eliminated
Ezekiel Jackson comes in and overpowers Tyler before being overpowered by Big Show. We get to see some fun, flashy offence from Rey Mysterio & Kofi Kingston here. Sheamus comes in and he is able to eliminate Kofi with the High Cross.
Kofi Kingston is eliminated
Rey Mysterio and CM Punk reignite their feud here and have a great sequence of moves. Eventually Alberto Del Rio tags himself in because he and Rey are rivals. After Punk shoves ADR into Rey, Del Rio decides to attack his own partner Rey some more, throwing him into the barricade. Rey appears to have injured his arm and is taken to the back by officials.
Jack Swagger works over CM Punk until he manages to tag in John Morrison. Morrison escapes an ankle lock and lands Starship Pain to pin Swagger.
Jack Swagger is eliminated
I love Starship Pain. Such an awesome move.
Not long after this, Sheamus drops Tyler Reks with a Brogue Kick and pins him.
Tyler Reks is eliminated
Who?
Big Show comes in and knocks Sheamus out of the ring. Hornswoggle taunts Sheamus with a Smackdown flag, so Sheamus pushes him to the floor. Big Show gets angry and goes after him, they brawl up the ramp until they’re both get counted out.
Sheamus & Big Show are eliminated
Big Show looks like a huge moron, fighting away from the ring and getting himself counted out. As soon as he stepped out of the ring I knew this was coming.
Edge and R-Truth both enter the ring for the first time. Edge starts hot with clotheslines and elbows. Truth fires back with clotheslines of his own, but he misses a scissor kick and Edge nails him with a spear.
R-Truth is eliminated
John Morrison takes Edge down. He goes for Starship Pain but Edge rolls out of the way. Edge spears Morrison and pins him.
John Morrison is eliminated
CM Punk goes for the GTS but Edge counters with an Impaler DDT. Punk leapfrogs another spear attempt. Del Rio tags himself in and beats up Punk. Punk backslides ADR and pins him.
Alberto Del Rio is eliminated
Rey Mysterio attacks Alberto Del Rio on his way back down to the ring. It is 3-2 in favour of Smackdown and it stays this way for a little while. Edge is slowly beaten up by Team Raw for what feels like an eternity. The Miz hits the backbreaker/neckbreaker combo for a 2 count. Edge drops Punk with an electric chair to finally get a tag to Rey.
Mysterio and Punk mix it up again, the pace quickens finally. They go counter for counter and trade pinfall attempts. Rey hits the 619 and the splash on CM Punk for the pin.
CM Punk is eliminated
Ezekiel Jackson comes in and stomps on Rey’s injured arm. Rey tries to fight back but Jackson flattens him with a tackle. Jackson slowly beats Rey up, but Mysterio shows heart and fights back. He manages to hit another 619, but he botches the splash and awkwardly falls on top of Jackson. He still pins him though.
Ezekiel Jackson is eliminated
The Miz attacks Rey, but he gets put in position for a 619. Alex Riley sacrifices himself to protect The Miz, allowing Miz to counter the splash into a pin, but Rey kicks out. The Miz goes for the Skull Crushing Finale, Rey rolls through and tags Edge who nails Miz with a spear to win.
The Miz is eliminated
The Commentary
Michael Cole asks Jerry Lawler what makes Raw stars have the emotional investment in this match. A tough question when the answer is “they don’t” and Jerry struggles to spit out a coherent answer. Matt Striker says that he has to interrupt. Jerry says “no you don’t have to interrupt me, shut up.”. Matt Striker goes on to say Smackdown is “young, hip & vibrant”, when their team features veterans like Big Show, Rey Mysterio and Edge. Michael Cole talks about Smackdown being Raw’s little brother, talking as if he isn’t doing weekly commentary for Smackdown and has been for many weeks.
Matt Striker keeps talking about ways Smackdown is better than Raw. Smackdown has been on for 12 seasons airing across 60 nations, something Raw has already accomplished. Also the “etymology of the word introduced into the lexicon. Smackdown is in the dictionary. Raw is in the dictionary but it means something else.” I don’t understand his point here. The word Raw has multiple meanings yes but the show is named after what they wanted the show to feel like. Gritty, rough, raw. Smackdown is named after a catchphrase. Smackdown’s definition is a bitter contest/confrontation, or a decisive/humiliating defeat. Whatever his point was, he sounds stupid.
Big Show and Ezekiel Jackson are wrestling. Matt Striker says “two powerful, carbon-based life forms colliding.” I don’t know why he said that but he isn’t wrong, we are all carbon-based life forms. It’s just a weird thing to say.
Sheamus enters the ring to face Kofi Kingston and Matt Striker says “Sheamus is arguably the toughest person in the ring right now.” No shit.
Matt Striker says that both Michael Cole and Jerry Lawler are going to be “eating broke” because Smackdown are going to win. “Put that in your juice box and suck it, boys.”
Matt Striker says he will lace his boots if he has to fight for Smackdown. Michael Cole says “Smackdown wants to win, Matt.” Rare Michael Cole W here.
Matt Striker compares Edge & Rey Mysterio fighting for Team Smackdown as “Willis Reed in Game 7” which is an even more dated reference. He is referencing a 1972-73 basketball game which is incredibly niche and another example of Striker trying to look cool.
Edge is on the wrong end of a beat down for a significant amount of time. Miz locks in a choke and Matt Striker says “this actually bodes well for Edge because it gives him an opportunity to collect his thoughts”.
Matt Striker talks about “Smackdown fans” as if there are people who choose to watch either Raw or Smackdown based off some sort of allegiance to one or the other.
Once Team Smackdown win, Matt Striker reaches god levels of insufferable. He goes full-blown Michael Scott from The Office. He starts thrusting towards Cole & Lawler saying “in your face” and pointing at them. “You know where it is? It’s in your face. On your face.” He is such a moron.
Michael Cole realises that he works for Smackdown too and starts joining in the celebrations a little.
analysis
My rating; **
For the most part this is fine, but it is a 28 minute match. It goes on for a very long time and those involved didn’t come in with a lot of creative ideas to make the match fun to watch. This match will age you.
I don’t see why this needed to be a 7 vs 7 when they could have easily trimmed the fat and made this far more enjoyable. Imagine if this was Edge, Mysterio, Del Rio & Kofi vs Punk, Morrison, Sheamus & The Miz? That is a far more appealing match up to me at least.
A lot of this was just 2 guys doing a sequence, before someone else tags in and does a sequence and the cycle continues. It was a lot of just guys hitting moves and then an elimination would happen.
Whenever Rey Mysterio and CM Punk were in the ring, the match was great. The rest of the time, it was fine. I’m unsure why Ezekiel Jackson was so prominent in the end. I guess Vince wanted to push him but it never really worked out.
I did like Edge and Rey Mysterio surviving, 2 members of the famous Smackdown Six back in the day. That was a nice touch to me.
An okay match with not a lot happening but it had a couple of fun sequences.
John Cena sits backstage looking like the saddest girl at the prom, tears in his eyes at the thought of having to support Wade Barrett in his match tonight.
We get a video package with highlights of John Cena’s loss at Hell in a Cell and his new forced alliance with the Nexus. It is a generic PG era promo package. You would think this is the most emotional storyline of all time with the depressing music playing in the background. The biggest thing I noticed is that this hype package is all about John Cena and Wade Barrett. Sure, Randy Orton is featured but he is barely the focus of this whole thing. The WWE champion shouldn’t be a third wheel in a WWE championship match.
Also, why is John Cena so sad watching Randy Orton get his ass kicked? These guys are supposedly each other’s greatest rivals. Orton punt kicked Cena’s dad once! He should be pretty chill about this.
Randy Orton (c) vs Wade Barrett, WWE Championship
Michael Cole is back in face mode of course because John Cena is out here. Wade Barrett comes out with John Cena looking like a lost puppy. No sign of the tag titles that Cena won earlier in the show.
Randy Orton comes out to a huge reaction. I don’t know if it is clear to you guys, but to me he looks ready to phone it in. Commentary keep repeating the same points over and over about how Orton is at a disadvantage, Cena is in an unfair position and the odds are in Barrett’s favour. Cole calls Cena the “King of disgruntled employees”. Matt Striker wrongfully explains that Randy Orton is looking behind him to show that he is a man, coming out to defend the championship on his own, when in reality he is probably searching for The Nexus.
There is no aura from WWE commentators in this period. All they can do is repeat the same storyline information, plug arena and city they are in, plug the places around the world they are airing from, plug WWE.com and have painfully cringe banter amongst them.
Just in case we are all suffering from a brain injury, Wade Barrett grabs a mic and reiterates that John Cena ia fired if Wade doesn’t win. Some of the crowd cheer for this. Michael Cole says “Well, just when you think it couldn’t get any worse for John Cena, that bombshell is dropped on Cena’s shoulders by Wade Barrett.”
What are you talking about? This is not some sort of surprise reveal, this has been a narrative throughout the show and previous weeks! Oh my god I hate you PG era Cole.
The Match
The bell rings and we have a lot of standing around. The camera cuts to sad Cena, which it will be doing A LOT throughout this match. John Cena just stands at ringside like a statue, as if he is a glitched NPC. Very loud “fire Cena” chants from the crowd which of course commentary do not refer to at all. Barrett tosses Orton out of the ring in front of Cena. They have a brief face to face but Orton walks away. Wade Barrett looks pissed, he rolls out of the ring and stands face to face with Cena but they don’t say anything.
Wade Barrett kicks Orton before a lock up and stomps him out in the corner. Orton counters and hits a clothesline out of the corner. Pretty loud chants in favour of Barrett here too. Barrett gets a boot up in front of a charging Orton and continues to stomp Orton out. Barrett chokes Orton on the ropes in front of Cena. He distracts the referee and expects Cena to cheap shot Orton but he doesn’t. Barrett rolls out and this time shouts at him. They argue, Orton attacks Barrett from behind.
Orton locks in a chin lock, Barrett escapes and locks in a sleeper hold, Orton counters with a back suplex. They go outside, Barrett whips him into the steel steps to take control. Wade Barrett slowly works over Randy Orton for what feels like a lifetime. He gets near falls from a diving elbow drop, a pumphandle slam and a punching combo.
The action spills out of the ring again, Barrett sends Orton back and forth between the barricade and the ring apron. Barrett locks in the chin lock again, Orton escapes, Barrett goes for the pumphandle again and Orton lands a dropkick. Orton goes for the apron hung DDT but Barrett resists, pushing Orton into the referee. Barrett hits a clothesline and demands John Cena get on the apron. Orton pushes Wade into Cena, knocking Cena to the floor and Orton hits a backbreaker.
The Nexus run out to beat up Randy Orton. John Cena runs in and takes all of the Nexus out as Barrett drops Orton with a boot. Cena explains to an angry Barrett that he was rushing in to save Barrett from losing by DQ which is actually a glimmer of good booking amongst this nonsense. Wade Barrett goes for Wasteland, but Orton escapes and hits his comeback. Clotheslines and a powerslam. Orton hits the apron hung DDT and prepares for the RKO. John Cena appears from behind, but he runs past Orton to grab Barrett and hit him with an AA, causing a disqualification.
Randy Orton and John Cena look eye to eye. Cena pulls his saddest face at Orton whilst Randy looks upset at the result. John Cena grabs the WWE title to hand to Orton, but he gets an RKO for his troubles. Orton drops Barrett with an RKO too. Randy poses with his WWE title to close the show.
The Commentary
Commentary talk about how John Cena had an opportunity to drop Randy Orton but he didn’t do it. The referee was right there watching the match so that doesn’t make a lot of sense.
Matt Striker says that no one has ever challenged John Cena’s psyche. You don’t think Randy Orton challenged Cena’s psyche by attacking his dad? Or how about Rob Van Dam when he forced Cena to defend his WWE title against him in front of a hostile ECW crowd? There is probably more examples that pre-date this match, but those 2 are the ones that come to mind immediately.
Commentary talk about how John Cena needs the WWE which is pretty hilarious knowing that in a few more years, he proves that he really doesn’t.
Michael Cole shows some self awareness by saying “we keep talking about this” then proceeds to re-tell the same story in a different way of John Cena being humiliated and frustrated by the Nexus.
Matt Striker says that Wade Barrett “twists his fists on impact and that will open someone up.” No Matt, if you knew how to throw a punch, you would know that you have to twist your fist to throw a proper punch. Otherwise you are just moving your arm back and forth like you’re operating a slot machine. He also says “twistuses his fistuses” because he is a dork.
The commentary barely call this match. 90% of their dialogue is talking about John Cena, what he is thinking and how frustrated he must be. OH MY GOD. Every couple of minutes it is “what do you think John Cena is thinking about now?” or “If Wade Barrett loses this match, John Cena could be fired” or words to those effects. WE GET IT. WE ARE NOT FUCKING IDIOTS. Even a child fan of WWE can understand what is happening without the constant over-explanation.
Michael Cole calls Randy Orton’s signature powerslam a scoop slam. Come on Cole, he has done this move so many times at this point. He also says “ladies & gentlemen, he is the man who hears voices in his head” which is so lame.
Commentary spend far too long trying to figure out the finish of the match and again over-explaining what happened just in case any of us with brain leaks couldn’t figure it out. Seriously, the last 3 minutes of this show is a solid block of commentary, mostly Michael Cole, just talking about the finish and why it happened. It was unnecessary, but even if it was necessary, a finish to a match shouldn’t need so much context just for it to make sense. Also commentary put this over as if John Cena pulled out a record-breaking checkmate in chess. People have been causing DQs in wrestling to prevent a title change for literal decades.
Analysis
My rating; 3/4*
Awful. If there is ever a match that can some up the frustrations with PG era WWE, I think this match has it all. Bad wrestling, bad storytelling, a lame DQ finish on a PPV, not pushing younger talent and of course, overuse of John Cena. Barrett and Orton did nothing in this match, but why should they? The story was not about Orton and Barrett, the story was “when is John Cena going to get involved” so there was no suspense at all until a referee was bumped.
So John Cena’s grand plan was to cause a DQ so Barrett would win, but not the title. Okay, why didn’t Cena just drop Wade Barrett in the opening minutes of the match when he got in his face? Sure the match would end in like 3 minutes, but we could have been saved from this 15 minute snooze fest. The booking just didn’t make sense in the grand scheme of things. Cena could have done this earlier and not risked Barrett actually coming close to winning.
Randy Orton is in cruise control here. He puts in zero effort until it is time for him to hit his comeback and signature moves. I don’t blame him, but when the WWE champion clearly doesn’t care then why should we?
Fan response clearly shows how bad this angle is. They are chanting for Barrett and “fire Cena”. They eventually get Cena fired anyways, for like a week, so they might as well have done it here and made a new star in the process.
Aftermath
No More Bragging Rights
Bragging Rights 2009 brought 181,000 PPV buys. Bragging Rights 2010 did 137,000. That is a 24% decrease and led to a $2.5m decline in PPV revenue in the last quarter of 2010. This is just proof that the whole “Brand Warfare” conflict isn’t really something that the fans are into. They wouldn’t run another Bragging Rights, however when they brought back to Brand Split in 2016 WWE would try and make Raw vs Smackdown a thing again. 2021 was the last time WWE did Raw vs Smackdown, because the fans are not interested in this fake rivalry. It could work if there was actually some stakes, but there was never anything at stake other than “Bragging Rights”.
What Happened Next?
They did an Orton vs Barrett rematch at Survivor Series with Cena as the referee. Orton won, Cena got fired for like a week and then defeated Wade Barrett at the TLC PPV, destroying the last ounces of momentum he or the Nexus had left. The Miz would cash in his MITB briefcase shortly after Survivor Series and reign as champion for several months, even defeating John Cena in a bad Wrestlemania main event.
We wouldn’t see the Undertaker again until the start of 2011 where he challenges Triple H to a match at Wrestlemania. Kane holds the Heavyweight title until the December where he loses it to Edge in a 4-way TLC match.
Final Words
Bragging Rights 2010 is an exhausting show from an exhausting time period to be a WWE fan. This show is less than 3 hours long, but it feels way longer than any AEW show I have ever watched.
Similarly to the 2022 Royal Rumble event, this starts off strong before completely fumbling the bag. Daniel Bryan vs Dolph Ziggler was a great opener, a reminder that WWE in 2010 isn’t all doom and gloom. The “divas” match was probably the second best match on the show. The Bragging Rights 14-man tag was fine, but it went far too long and didn’t have enough excitement to warrant the length. Everything else sucks. From the underwater fist fight between Kane and Undertaker, to impromptu TV matches between Goldust & DiBiase, to the poorly booked snoozefest that was the main event.
Brutal commentary on this show. They spend far too much time cracking jokes, over-contextualising and putting themselves over. They barely call any moves, to a point I am convinced that they don’t actually know what the moves are called.
I think this is a worse show than Royal Rumble 2022, but it is not as offensive to me as Cage of Death or Heroes of Wrestling is.
If you like torture, here is a link to The Undertaker vs Kane Buried Alive match.
Worst of Wrestling Leaderboard
- Heroes of Wrestling
- Cage of Death XXI
- 2010 Bragging Rights
- 2022 Royal Rumble
- NXT Season 1
Let me know if there are any other terrible wrestling shows you think could be a contender for worst of all time. I have a massive list already but I am always willing to add more. For now, it is time to spin the Wheel of Woe.
Wheel of Woe
It was only a matter of time before we get to talk about World Championship Wrestling. At one point they were on top of the wrestling world, but they started a downward spiral in 1998 that ended up in the death of the company. WCW have had many bad shows, both before and after their rise to the top of the wrestling mountain. I always love talking about the must-see car crash that is WCW and I think Bash at the Beach 1999 is going to be a great example of what the hell was going wrong for WCW in their war against the WWF.
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